What would I know about love?

Disclaimer: Love is different for every person who experiences it and my experiences are not all-encompassing.

I am not entirely a cynic, but I don’t celebrate Valentine’s Day. If other people want to enjoy it, then sure, I say go for it if that’s what you like! I don’t expect gifts, I don’t want them. It’s not me.

I do, however, believe in love (including self-love). I want to share it and celebrate it. And that’s why I am writing today. I want to write about what I have learnt of love in my twenties, since I started dating my lover, D.


Here ‘goes…

A person’s worth and love are not measured by the gifts he/she buys for his/her partner.

He/she may lift you up when you are down, but you’ve also got to do some work. One partner cannot be everything you need all at once.

Love takes work. Harmony and balance are worthy goals, which are nurtured by: patience, distance, exercise, humour, closeness, quality time, and space.

Another person is not you. Love is always a two-way street.

Love is unpredictable and never what you expect.

Love needs silence. And hugs.

Sleeping at the same time goes a long way.

Love requires trust and honesty.

Partners need to communicate and listen to one another. Love needs open ears and eyes.

Love flourishes with laughing and playing. It’s made to be fun.

Sex should be enjoyed, as much as possible, and never used against another person. Sometimes all a little anger needs is a good romp!

If anything, you’ll always learn something from love.

It is intense and constant; it remains throughout any struggle. It’s there on bad days and good days.

It is a constant work in progress, but it’s worth the ride.


If you feel a little left out of this post, I hope it may speak to anyone seeking self-love. I know I seek it and the above helps me with that.

Love, for me, is really a constant work in progress as I’ve said. It’s a constant work in progress for myself and as it is. I have learnt the most from being intense with other people and I enjoy the learning process. I believe that balance and harmony are really difficult to achieve if you are opposed to your partner in some way, but I constantly seek ways to achieve those two things. So stay tuned into my search!

“Happy Valentine’s Day!”


Before I go, some UPDATES:

See you soon! (You’re amazing!)


25 responses to “What would I know about love?”

  1. Wonderful take on Valentine’s day. I think it should be a day when anyone can take time out to express their love to others not just significant others. Thanks for your wise and thoughtful insight x


    1. Thank you! You’re right, it should be a day to express love for everyone and anyone we wish to. And I don’t see why any of us cannot make it so, I’m sure some of us do. But there’s never enough time in just one day to do so!


  2. Thank you for this post. Love the way you perceive love. It appeals to my cynical mind.


    1. Haha thank you too, and I’m glad it appeals to your cynical mind. Perhaps you can tell me how you view love.


      1. Well, my perception is not as developed and clear as yours (I am still a confused soul when it comes to love), but the basic idea is that real love is something possible only between two people who respect each other. To me, respect and love are inseparable. And also, I believe that sweet talk and gifts can only take you so far. It is common beliefs and open discussion of ideas that cement it. Perhaps I should write a post on it! And I am glad that there are others (especially young adults) who ask the same questions about Valentine’s day. Very refreshing! 🙂


      2. I think that’s more developed and clear than you give it credit, really. Go ahead and write about it, I’m sure you’d have some interesting things to say. And I really like your take, because I do think that respect is a huge part of it, no doubt about it. And I guess that’s actually a huge part of what I was trying to say, because when you respect another person the above things start working together I think. That and, common beliefs and open discussion as you say, are really important! As you know, I agree that material gifts and to an extent, sweet talking, also only get so far, but I guess it really depends on who people are and what they think about that. For me, they don’t do much at all. And I don’t like seeing people getting mad at their partner for not buying them enough or not taking Valentine’s Day seriously enough for them. It ends up being about something entirely different than love, and I’m not sure I understand what it is. Thank you – glad to have a chat about it!


    2. I love your questions on your ‘The Big Fat Valentine’s Day’ blog – I ask the same things myself.


      1. I have written the post I promised, and linked to this article as well. 🙂


      2. Fantastic… I’m going to read it!


  3. […] post is the result of my conversation with Julie Green on her post What Would I Know About Love. Since my post on Valentine’s day, I have found that there are some people who relate to my […]


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